We hardly know these people. They are distant relatives of my wife’s extended family on her twice removed grandmother’s side, but they sent us this wedding invitation and my wife…  You know how it is, so we went. But I took my laptop, just in case, I explained, I had to help out with the family tree at the reception. I, of course, would have preferred to stay home and practice my online gambling. I’m working up a sweat for the coming World Series Of Poker and trying to win a place at one of the tables.   

Just as well laptop was there to help me out. The bride was pretty, the food was good, the whisky was the best and the company at the table was okay, considering what you can land up with. Then the dancing began. The guys in the band were all deaf and we didn’t recognize any of the music which was delivered through gigantic speakers that set the whole building trembling. After a few minutes at about 1000 decibels, I told my wife that as much as I loved and respected her new-found family, I was going outside to have a break. I took my laptop for safekeeping – you never know with new relatives – and I went out into the silence. I immediately opened the laptop and logged into the Silver Spanner, my favorite online casino. 

I played online slots on a progressive jackpot slot machine. Did you hear that someone called Sylvia K, a Canadian, won over 4 million dollars last week playing a progressive jackpot slot machine in an online casino? The story is true. I saw the interview with Sylvia. She couldn’t talk.

A progressive jackpot is the only way there is, besides the Lotto and a TV show, of becoming an instant millionaire. So I sat on a bench outside and clicked my mouse, while inside the deaf guests danced the night away. I never won the progressive jackpot which was hovering around the 3 million dollar mark, but I hit 2 small jackpots that made the wedding quite worthwhile. And this morning my hearing has returned to normal.

Posted on: September 7, 2008

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