Maybe you should take a loan until this blows over, suggests my wife. Repair my stock exchange portfolio with a loan? Are you kidding? My stock exchange portfolio is beyond repair. I am about to pull everything out of there and invest the proceeds in an online casino. I invested wisely and conservatively in stocks. I bought blue chips only and now and again had a wild fling on a stock with long odds. Sundays at 6 pm was my personal investment time. I filled a crystal glass with ice and poured a couple of inches of single malt whisky over the cubes. I went into my study, lit a fat cigar and pulled out my portfolio file. Then I would go over the week’s activities. I would smile where I had chosen wisely and groan where a company had not behaved according to my plan. I was doing well. The paltry sum of $30,000 that I had invested some years back was now nudging the 200 grand mark. Another couple of years, I gloated, it’ll be half a million. From there to one million would be a matter of course. I sneered at my friend who boasted about the fortunes they were making in the online casinos. Not for me, I said. My money is safe! Things changed. What was this sub-prime mortgage thing that was buzzing all over town? I sat quietly waiting for the fuss to go away and watching my fortune starting to dwindle. I was scared to sell and scared to buy. The papers were full of conflicting reports. My losses were starting to look serious. Then it hit. My blue chip stocks went down the tubes faster than dishwater. Three hundred thousand became two hundred and kept falling. It is now one hundred and I am about to sell everything and go to the online casino. What will I play in the online casino? It’s not that important. Some days I’ll play the slot machines and hope for a life changing progressive jackpot. Some days I’ll play blackjack. When I’m adventurous I’ll play Texas Hold’em poker and when I feel like gambling I’ll play baccarat or roulette. Whatever it is, I’m going to have fun! Posted on: February 2, 2009
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